ONE –Death. It can come slowly or like a shock wave. It seems lately, there’s been more loss of family friends and loved ones. I’m not sure why it seems loss comes in waves or in threes, as some would say. It’s never easy. Whether it’s too young, too soon, too whatever. No one is ever ready. And no one is ever prepared.
When I lost my grandmother when I was 15, I never looked at death the same way again. It was devastating. It was the most pain I had ever felt in my life. I mean, I have been dreading the death of my own parents since I was in my 30’s. I was starting to distance myself from my parents, especially my mom, because I didn’t want to feel that pain of loss. The loneliness of having lost your actual OLDEST friend.
Several of my friends have lost either one or both of their parents. They have survived it. Recovered from it. How, I don’t know. I mean, their parents were just as much part of my life. I guess when I decided to shut myself off from death, I shut myself of feeling the pain and while death makes me sad, it doesn’t take me out. Today, I’m thinking about Dr. Dog, Miss Polly, Big Gary, Big Dan, Pat-pa-tat, Miss Molly, Virgin-for-short-but-not-for-long, GaryWynne (because he may have been the first person I ever called by their first and last name as if it were one name), and Gene. These wonderful people who welcomed me into their home and treated me like one of their own. I am grateful for knowing them and for the love they showed me growing up. For the laughs and for showing me that I am the lucky one. I still have both of my parents and I am not going to waste anymore time reminding them how much I love them.
and TWO –Taxes. Today is tax in the USA. If you haven’t filed, you’d better file an extension or get those babies sent off. I finally did my taxes back at the end of March. I am also pleasantly surprised to have my refund already. Too bad it’s already spent on things that need to be repaired. Good luck to all of you late filers!